Sunday, December 13, 2009


December is not my favorite month. 

December for me is not a month about glitter, gifts and glam.

December is the month that my father was kidnapped and murdered.

December is the month that every year since my father's death, I play the 'what if' game. 

December is the month that I can be driving down the road and have to pull over because the pain in my heart is too intense.

December is the month that I just want the whole world to stop.

December is the month that I wish I could be with my family to reflect and just spend time together.

December is the month that my husband and son just know that a good cup of tea and an extra hug is all I need.

December is the month that would be a good month for my friends to buy shares in Xanax.


  1. Out of boredom I decided to read your oldest posts and catch up. Boy have I been missing out on what a treasure!

    I think you can forgive me for saying I hate it when I see people leave comments on other blogs saying "hugs!" It shows their inability to empathize with suffering and superficial attempts at being friends. I don't mean to offend you if you do so, neither do I mean to detract from the sincerity of people who have done so on your blog. Anyway, my point is, when i read this, I wanted to cry out for you. Everyone else is usually busy trying to be happy in December, a time when family rejoices. And yet there you are suffering every time the month comes along. I admire you for taking things in stride when you can, and surviving through it all. Have I told you that you're the only person in blogger I sincerely like? Everyone else is so inauthentic to me, caught up in the latest blogging fad of how to get followers and how to kiss their ass. You show integrity where I thought none existed. Not to mention, your opinions I always value to be original, mature, and down to earth.

    I've never lost any one that important to me, so I hope to never know your pain. But judging from your future posts, I can tell you've coped and accepted it. That to me, parallels the courage of any person risking their lives to save others.

  2. Leila ~ you are very kind. Thank you.


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