Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I'll have a plate of worms with a side of crow please.

My life just sucks.  I don't have a job.  I have applied for many jobs and have received a few "at this time..." bull shit and mostly no response at all which really, really irks me.

I finally figured out why I do not have a job.  It is because I am an immigrant from South Africa who is over weight, has an accent, speaks a second language, is right handed, wears glasses, lives in a tree-hugging state, only has one child and drops the f-bomb quite a bit.  So hand me my plate of worms and leave me alone to wallow in my own self pity.

Hey, what is that I see in the distance coming closer at one hell of a rate ready to slap me upside the head.... wha... would that be common sense I see approaching?  No, surely not.  What is that you say Common Sense, that maybe someone more qualified got the job, that the lady who wanted to pay $5.00 an hour to watch her pug and insist you have a college degree is not worth it; the idiot who stipulated that you had to have been born and raised in this city to even consider applying is violating some major labor laws and probably someone you would not want to work for?  Don't you just hate it when Common Sense knocks down your door with her 8 inch Louboutins (yes Common Sense has awesome fashion sense) yelling for you to get up off your ass and start counting your blessings Missy!

I have been thinking about this blog post for a while now as I have seen the beating of the chest and the banging of the drums and the groups all screaming "you hate me because I am.... (fill in the blank)" and then breaking into their little worm eating groups.  Damn are we just an egotistical, narcissistic bunch of whiners or what!

Enter my friend, The Rabbit.  Seriously this is one very smart guy and one willing to be interviewed for my blog that I couldn't find the words to string together to write.  There are many people who define who they are by various titles and I asked Rabbit the following:

There are many that define themselves as being a minority, you are gay, do you?

Personally I don't.  Gay is not WHO I am it is a part of what I am, like left-handed and red headed.  It does not define me as a person.  Who I am attracted to is by no means a definition of who I am - and I would hate to meet a person in which it is, that's pretty fucking shallow. (Rabbit says fuck a lot, it is like a comma in a sentence, just needed to disclose that)

So why then are there so many victims of gender, race, creed etc that say nothing is going to change?

Because they like to play the victim, they enjoy being a false martyr and receiving the pity, plus, if they are a victim it takes away the responsibility of doing something to change it.  They are wounded, they are too weak to cause a change, you should do it for them, where as I am more of the fuck that, give me a brick mentality.

So how come you get it?

I just don't like waiting on people to get off their ass and do something for my benefit.  If I want the change - if I want the benefit- by golly I am gonna put on my combat boots and stomp some ass to make it happen, sitting around and saying everyone hates me accomplishes nothing.  Go eat some worms and really that just makes people, like the straight community, hate you more.  I don't do apathy very well, can you tell?

So while I may not have a job I have an incredible husband who is not only going to school full time, but works 20 hours a week AND volunteers at the wildlife refuge and never once has put pressure on me about finding a job.  I have a roof over my head, I have food on the table, I have Rabbit to kick my ass when I wallow, I have great friends and an incredible family that live on entirely different continents, I have a healthy 18year old son who is currently experiencing the trip of a lifetime, I have my health and most of all, I have my wine. 

I am ready for my crow now. 


  1. That was a brilliant read! I feel like picking up a brick too! I really like Rabbit's answers too. You should start writing books or start therapy sessions for those victims :-)

  2. Well written Skattie.

    You're seeing the positives in your life.

  3. priceless!!!!
    thank you for sharing dear one!!!!

  4. Makes me think; and after much of that I came to a conclusion: WRITE A BOOK. Go with the flow, just try it. Create that circumstance!
    I love the way you put your thoughts into words.

  5. @Lydia ~ Thank you and yes Rabbit is awesome

    @Heidi ~ getting there just takes a few knocks sometimes

    @Boggom ~ you are welcome

    @Alex ~ Thank you and maybe one day, but it will be a very short book, who knows it could be the shortest book on getting that stick out of ones ass!

  6. Thanks for the kudos Lydia and Lidia. This is really a great post. I am proud to have been a part of it.

  7. @Rabbit ~ thanks for helping me string the words that were running around in my head.

  8. I like this post. And it's timely. Just yesterday I was reading some comments made by military wives that were going on and on and on about how they can't seem to handle deployment. And while I was reading I was just rolling my eyes. Sometimes situations arise that allow us to either play the "woe is me" card or to just get out of bed and live our life. As you say....we still have roofs over our heads, food to eat and family and friends to support us. I also believe that if we are patient, the right opportunity will show it's face. Your perfect job opportunity will show up.

    Oh...and I'll be heading to Target soon for some of those bins! :)

  9. Great post and one that I needed. I've been that close **pinches fingers together** to sending out invites to my pity party. (Don't worry you'll get one if I do throw a woe-is-me bash). But then I started to listen to other people and their whinging and thought, "Oh God, I do not want to sound like THAT." Doing a gratitude list always gets me through.
    And BTW, volunteering at wildlife refuge?? Now THAT is what I call HOT in a man. You are a very lucky woman! - G

  10. @Brooke ~ I know the perfect job will cross my path, but for now I am going to enjoy not working.

    @Ms Georgina ~ You have my address for the invite right? ;) And yes volunteering ~ nothing more sexier

  11. I enjoy not working too. I dread having to replenish my "corporate casual" wardrobe. :)

  12. As always spot on and with fun flare!

  13. I know - I always thought the US would be keen to hire foreigners, especially having a British accent but this wasn't the case and it was tough to get my first job. well good luck - For some reason I thought you were from Israel

  14. @Marian ~ thank you gorgeous xox

    @David ~ hahahaha, Israel... you crack me up!!


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