FROM THE DESK OF NUBIAN
2012 CANDIDATE FOR THE STATE OF MOTHERHOOD
Dear President Obama and Mr. Mitt Romney:
As we near the elections in November 2012 I am asking for your support. For the past 20 years I have served the State of Motherhood with vigor, tenacity and rose up to the many occasions when my patience was tried. Some will say that I did an incredible job, but there are those that say I had the help of an extraordinary amount of wine. I am not ashamed to admit that yes I do swallow and am extremely proud of that fact.
Currently times are tough for us all. I was at our local grocery store today and noticed that while prices were the same, the contents in the containers have actually got less. Who are these people that misguide us in our purchases? There is a rumor that they spit, but I am not one to encourage rumors. We need to keep this campaign classy.
I am turning to you to ask for your help. We need to fight this fight together. Did you know that even the smallest donation will help me put gas in our car, food in our fridge and a roof over our head? Together we can march forward to the State of Motherhood with determination that tonight our child will not be eating baked beans on toast. That tonight we will not have to be creative with one can of corn, flour, sugar and milk. Tonight we will feast on a plate of fresh vegetables and meat from a sustainable local farm.
There is something in it for you.
For every $5.00 donation you will receive a wine cork with my signature on it.
For every $10.00 donation you will receive not only a wine cork but also a label from one of the many empty bottles that I have personally consumed from. On each wine label will be some motivational quote from something I found online.
For every $20.00 donation you will receive a cork and wine bottle with label attached and a tapered candle for your dining table. This will be one of the most prized positions amongst your extensive art collection.
I am enclosing a self addressed stamped envelope for your convenience and I look forward to your contribution and support.
Together we can do this.
2012 Candidate for the State of Motherhood